“Squeeze My Cans “Squeeze My Cabaret” A Double Whammy for Scientology!

By Ernest Kearney — Cathy Schenkelberg’s harrowing, hilarious and eye-opening account of her 20 years in the Scientology cult, Squeeze My Cans, was one of the hits of HFF2016 and took top honors with TVO as the Best One Woman Shows. Since them she’s been wowing them in Fringes from Vancouver to Edinburgh. Now she’s returned to L.A. and if you missed the show in 2016 here’s another chance to catch one of the smartest and most sophisticated productions you’ll ever see.

But this year Schenkelberg, to quote a popular gum commercial from the fifties, “double the pleasure, double the fun” with Squeeze My Cabaret, a songfest and high-kicking accusatory lambasting of the world’s most dangerous cult that lands a solid boot right in L. Ron’s personal “E-meters.”

With sharp and stinging ditties like, “I Can Make You Feel Special When It Sucks to Be You,” and “You Can Pretend to Be Anything You Want to Be – Just Sign Right Here,” Schenkelberg exposes the tactics Scientology employs in its recruiting of wide-eyed innocents like she herself once was.

Schenkelberg serves up huge helpings of steaming satire with her parody of Judy Garland from the film Broadway Melody of 1938, which introduced the song, “You Made Me Love You” to America.

In the Garland film it was “Dear, Mister Gable,” Schenkelberg tweaks it to “Dear Mister Hubbard.” Only it’s not a “fan” letter she’s penning.

Other highpoints of the show involve Schenkelberg in a dance number with Xenu, the evil space dictator who 75 million years ago killed billions of his followers (in volcanoes – hence the cover art on Dianetics) whose spirits now float around as disembodied “thetans” that get in our heads and make us want to do crazy stuff like shave our neighbor’s dog or wear a MAGA hat in public.

The show reveals the lunacy behind the “religion” Scientology, but it also reveals Schenkelberg has got a pair of pipes on her that could knock a bald eagle outta midair from a mile away.

I highly recommend you catch her straight show, Squeeze My Cans, which is a disturbing recounting of how she was seduced into a cult that consumed twenty years of her life, nearly a million dollars of her earnings and was reaching out towards her young daughter with its tentacles before she finally broke free. For honesty and drama it beats out Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath hands down.

Then follow up Squeeze My Cans with the song and dance of Squeeze My Cabaret, and enjoy a double dose of inspiring narratives. In “Cans” Schenkelberg impales Scientology with her story. In “Cabaret” she does it with raucous toe tapping fun.

Of course for L. Ron, Schenkelberg is using the dancing shoes she borrowed off Rosa Klebb. (1)

For another great show The Tvolution’s HFF 2019 third –Platinum Medal


(1) Spectre’s “Number 3” in From Russia With Love

Squeeze My Cans

playing during The Fringe at

The Broadwater

1076 Lillian Way

For Complete Show Information: http://hff19.org/5844

Squeeze My Cabaret

playing during The Fringe at

Lounge Theatre
6201 Santa Monica Boulevard

For Complete Show Information: http://hff19.org/5845


For Events, Plays and Other Fun Fringe News and Info: https://www.hollywoodfringe.org/

Written by

An award-winning L.A. playwright and rabble-rouser of note who has hoisted glasses with Orson Welles, been arrested on three continents and once beat up Charlie Manson. His first play, "Among the Vipers" was a semi-finalist in the Julie Harris Playwriting Competition and was featured in the Carnegie-Mellon Showcase of New Plays. It was produced at the NPT Theater in Ashland, Oregon and Los Angeles’ celebrated Odyssey Ensemble Theatre. His following play, “The Little Boy Who Loved Monsters” was produced at The Hollywood Actors Theater, where he earned praise from the Los Angeles Times for his “…inordinately creative writing.” The play went on to numerous other productions including Berlin’s The Black Theatre under the direction of Rainer Fassbinder who wrote in his program notes of Kearney, “He is a skilled playwright, but more importantly he is a dangerous one.” Ernest Kearney has worked as literary manager or as dramaturge for among others The Hudson Theater Guild, Nova Diem and the Odyssey Ensemble Theatre, where he still serves on the play selection committee. He has been the recipient of two Dramalogue Awards and a finalist or semi-finalist, three times, in the Julie Harris Playwriting Competition. His work has been performed by Michael Dunn, Sandra Tsing Loh, Jack Colvin and Billy Bob Thornton, and to date, either as playwright or director, he has upwards of a hundred and thirty productions under his belt, including a few at the Bob Baker Marionette Theater as puppeteer. Kearney remains focused on his writing, as well as living happily ever after with his lovely wife Marlene. His stage reviews and social essays can be found at TheTVolution.com and workingauthor.com. Follow him on Facebook.

No comments


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.